i feel like dying. this fucking family is fucking hard to maintain. fucking people are messing up my life. fucking emotions. fuck money. i think i cant take pressure but seriously. this familiy is already corrupted before my existence. i cant take it in. argh, fuck in man. thie family runs on the word money. all about money and what? love? nah, just a small, minute percentage. money? yeah the majority kinda all cause if u were to draw a pie chard, u can barely see the part about love. maybe this is just parts of the different timings in life but yeah, i cant take it. seriously, i think i just might have back the thoughts of suicide. although i know i wont do it cause i dun have the courage. but i cant take it anymore. its not like i have no stress from my peers and my notorious history. i really hate it. i cant seem to lead a normal life. i think i'll just die. i dont have the looks. i dont have the brains. i dont even have a family, a proper one infact. maybe i do, in terms of external but i certainly do not have a regular family. i really dont know if its just part and parcel of life and something we must experience growing up. but i cant tolerate it anymore. i feel that this year, so near my birthday, everything will just come apart slowly and the finale is on my bday. i have no mood and maybe i can create a news as headline as "girl died on her b'day"
maybe. maybe not.

im just kidding. lol, yup yup so, this is just some anger stuff. i think i need anger management classes. lol.

ciao everyone. particularly me cause no one knows this blog.